As I am writing about opening up about your mental health, I am struggling with it myself. I’ve realized I haven’t spoken on this subject on my blog yet.

So here it is, I’ve struggled with depression for most of my life. I take medication and I’ve been in therapy, and I’ve found great coping mechanisms that work for me, so we are in a good place right now. But mental health issues are a roller coaster, and it’s been a tough road to get to this better place that I’m in. And it’s still a work in progress.

Everyone is different, and what helps someone may not help everyone else, but I have found that opening up about my mental health has helped me a lot, and maybe it will help you as well.

Start by admitting it to yourself

The most important thing I’ve learned in my 26 years of life is that there is no “normal.” When I first discovered the idea of depression, it felt like there was a problem with me, and that I was the only one struggling. I spent the first 5 or 6 years of being depressed trying to convince myself I wasn’t depressed, because admitting it would be admitting there was something wrong with me. I remember the first time I said “I have depression.” It felt like a weight lifted off my back that I never even knew was there. It felt good to acknowledge it. And when I finally put that out into the world, I realized I wasn’t the only person that struggled with this.

If this all sounds like you, know that it’s okay. I understand, and you are not alone.

You may struggle with depression or anxiety or something along those lines, but it does not define you. People say “I am depressed” but saying that is letting the depression take over. There are so many other sides of you that you are pushing away to focus on the depression. “I have depression” is a more accurate way of putting it. Someone going through cancer would not say “I am cancer.” It is not you. It does not define you. You are not your depression. You are not your anxiety. It is something you have to deal with every day and it makes your life more difficult, but it does not make you any less important, or normal, or special. You are a person aside from what you struggle with.

Let yourself acknowledge the depression, but don’t spend all your time and energy on it. Let yourself also acknowledge the part of you that enjoys life.

Give yourself time alone, and don’t be afraid to feel sad, to *feel* depressed, because it is also an emotion. And Ignoring it usually only makes it worse. But also make time for the things you enjoy. Don’t spend every second thinking about how depressed you are. Set it aside, find a distraction, think about other things.

Find someone likeminded

This has been such a helpful step for me. It can be difficult to bring up the subject, but if you can find someone similar to you, it will make it much easier to talk about the subject. Over the years, I’ve started to find more and more people like me, and those people are the ones I have become closest with over the years, because they can connect with you on a deeper level, they know exactly what you are going through. And they end up being the people that help you the most. I’ve spent many late nights with my friends talking about how it feels to be depressed, what thoughts I have and how I can work on changing my mindset. I’ve learned things about myself that I never would have known if I hadn’t said them out loud.

If you are struggling to find people to talk to about your mental health issues, or your friends and family aren't very supportive, there are other options. I've met some amazing people online by following someone on Instagram that is vocal about what they struggle with and are open to discussions, or finding groups or forums where people discuss mental health.

Or you can just talk with me! I'm writing this blog post for a reason, I want to help people like me. If I can do that just by being a listening ear, I would love to be that for you.

See a therapist

The most important step is to find a therapist. This can be very intimidating, trust me, I know. I’m still working on it as you read this. I’ve spent years putting off making the appointment to find a new therapist because it seemed like a lot of work or because I was scared. But I had to break it down into simpler steps.

I’ve recently been introduced to psychologytoday,com where you can browse therapists on your insurance and in your area. Each profile has a realistic photo and a self-written profile. You can filter the results based on what the therapist focuses on like depressions or anxiety, family or relationship issues, and different methods of therapy.

I highly suggest using this website if you’ve been thinking about looking for a therapist. Narrow it down to around 5 of your top picks, then reach out to them through email or phone to see if they are accepting new clients.

Keep in mind that not every therapist is for every person. So don’t give up after one poor experience. If you don’t feel like your therapist is the one for you and you don’t feel like their methods are working for you, it’s okay to find a new therapist.

Just talking about your past or speaking on your mental health with anyone can do wonders. Getting it out of your head and putting it into words is so beneficial. Talking to a friend or even a stranger can feel like therapy, but therapists are professionals. They can do so much more for you. They have scientifically proven methods to help you work through trauma and they can give you real ways to cope with your mental health issues that will continue to help for years to come.

If you’ve ever considered seeing a therapist and you have the ability to, please do it. No matter your age, gender, or mental health struggles.

If you are still struggling just to talk about your mental health issues and want to let it out, please feel free to reach out to me! I’m only an email or DM away and I am a great listener and very non-judgemental. :)

Stay safe

If you want, take a look at my Happiness Workbook. It’s no substitute for a therapist, but it might give you a few tips for creating healthier habits and for working on a healthier mindset.